Shattered Memories
by Gneo
Summary: Squall has memories of the past. He does not exactly like them. They don't like him, either. Will he finally accept these memories coming back to haunt him? Have you ever seen the words Squall and accept past in the same sentance?
1. De Ja Vu?

**HELLO! I gave re-birth to this once deleted story. The only thing that has changed is chapter three. So everything but chapter three is unchanged. Everything. Chapters one, and two have not been modified because there was nothing wrong with them. Just a note for the few people that actually read this before it was taken off.**

**Gneo: Disclaimer: Oh, I should probably say that I do NOT own any of the Final Fantasy characters, GF's, or any other crap. And if I did, Zell would wield a two-ton retarded chainsaw. (Sorry Zell fans, no offence) **

Shattered Memories

**Chapter One:**

**De ja vu?**

The sound of steel clanging echoed throughout the training center. Not even a T-Rexaur dared to interfere with this fight.

"So, you give?" Seifer asked sarcastically, smacking Squall on the side of the face with the flat of the gunblade, knocking him down. Seifer then pointed the tip of his gunblade at Squall's throat.

"Never." Squall said. He grabbed the flat side of Seifer's gunblade and concentrated on cold. Really cold. He sent a shockwave of blizzard magic up Seifer's gunblade, freezing both the gunblade, and the arm holding it with a very thin layer of ice. Seifer stumbled a step back, Squall jumped up, and shoulder charged Seifer, sending him back a good ten feet. Squall used this time to retreat, and pull his own gunblade out of the ground. But it took too much time, because when Squall finally pulled it loose, Seifer had lifted his frozen arm, and smashed it down on a nearby rock, freeing his once-frozen arm.

"Nice trick, Squall old boy. Here is mine." Seifer lifted his gunblade-free arm, and pointed his hand out at Squall, his palm starting glow red. "Please read and review."

Squall was thrown back, as the fireball hit him in the chest.

"GET READY!" yelled Seifer, as he ran up to Squall. Squall sat up just as Seifer landed a heavy downward slash right in the middle of Squall's face. Blood splashed onto the ground. Squall looked up, and saw his own deep crimson-red blood on his rival's sword. And it filled him with rage. Then something came to him, like he had been in this situation before. A _long_ time ago. But the rage came back and pushed the forgotten memory out. Still sitting, Squall kicked Seifer hard in the gut, which made him drop his gunblade, and stagger back a few feet. Squall took the opportunity, pushed himself up with the help of his own gunblade, and ran up to Seifer, dragging his gunblade on the ground, sending sparks flying into the air. Squall used all the energy he had to send his gunblade upward to Seifer's face. Seifer tried to jump back, but failed as the rising blade caught him right diagonally in the face. Blood flew through the air, and rained down on the ground, staining it with a red glow. This time it was Seifer who hit the ground, on his back. He also hit his head on the same rock that he used to shatter the ice off of his frozen arm. Squall dizzily walked over to Seifer, and pointed his gunblade at his throat.

"Do you yield—whoa…?" Squall held his throbbing head, suffering with heavy blood loss. When he took his hand off of his head, he saw five of his own blood-drenched hand, and five Seifers lying on the ground. The blood-loss was distorting his vision. Squall pointed his gunblade at the Seifer on the far right.

"Do you yiel-y-ye…" THUMP. Squall hit the ground right next to Seifer.

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXXxX

**Gneo: So, I know that this is a very short first chapter, but the second will be longer. Gimme a break! This is my first chapter. So review it please. Please?**

**O.J. did it.**


	2. WAKE UP POOPY HEAD!

**Gneo: Oh, by the way, I call the lunch ladies lunch lady1 and lunch lady2 because that is what they are called when you talk to them in the game! I'm okay. Please read and review. (Yeah, yeah, blah, blah, blah, who cares, just READ! Oh, and review too. Wait-ahhhhhh!") **

**Chapter Two:**

**WAKE UP POOPY HEAD!**

"_Do you yield_?"

"Squall, rise and shine!"

"_I said, do you yield_?"

"Come on, get you're lazy butt out of bed."

"_Seifer! Answer my question!_"

"WAKE UP POOPY HEAD!" Rinoa yelled as she tore the blankets off of the bed, and began smacking Squall in the face. Squall woke up with a start.

"Ow! Okay, okay, I'm up! I'm up!" Squall yelled as he tried to get up, but accidentally fell out of bed in front of Rinoa, who was half dressed.

"C'mon, stop fooling around, you are going to be late! Now get dressed, we gotta get going." Rinoa ordered.

"To where? For god sakes, it's six o' clock. I'm tired. And after last night, I'm sure you are too. Or at least you should be." Squall snapped, putting on a pair of black jeans.

"Selphie asked for everyone to meet her in the Quad." answered Rinoa, throwing a black shirt at Squall. Squall caught it and put it on. He found his two belts, and buckled the on.

"Oh, no. Not another stupid 'Garden Party' is it? Those are lame. Well, the drinks are nice…so was that one waitress…" said Squall.

"Knock it off." said Rinoa, slipping on some shorts. "And be nice. Selphie's you're friend. You know how sensitive she is. We have ten minutes, so hurry up and come on." Rinoa left the dorm room.

"Whatever." Squall replied.

XxX

Thirty minutes later

XxX

"Oh Squall, I'm so glad you could make it! Even though you are twenty minutes late… oh well, take a seat!" Selphie gestured to the only seat empty, which was next to an irritably mad Rinoa. Squall did not really want to sit by her, but he had to, so he did. Big mistake. As soon as he sat down, Rinoa immediately stomped hard on Squall's foot.

"Where have you been?" whispered Rinoa angrily.

"So? What do you guys think? Should we have the Garden Party in the training center? It just got a new addition. But so did the Quad… so…" asked Selphie.

"Um, I got lost." Squall replied. This caused Rinoa to give Squall's foot another stomp.

"Ow!" yelped Squall.

"…what? A Grat hit you in the head in the training center too Squall?" Selphie asked. "I guess people's heads just aren't safe in there. Maybe we should have it in the Quad after all. So, I was thinking…"

"Bull crap. Now, where were you?" whispered Rinoa.

"Oh, I think we should have, like a monster competition, like see how many monsters you can defeat in a certain time limit or something. If we have it in the training center that is." Said Squall, glad to avoid Rinoa's question. This total ignorance of Rinoa made her mad, and she crossed her arms with a nasty look on her face. No one seemed to notice though.

"Leave it to Squall to think up something having to do with fighting. Do you have any less-dangerous ideas?" said Zell, scratching his head lazily, which was all poofy from bed-hair.

"Oooooooh…do I detect a hint of chicken-wuss?" said Irvine sarcastically, he and Selphie seemed like the only ones who didn't seem tired.

"You know, if I didn't just wake up a half an hour ago, I would feel like kick'en you're ass. But I'm just too damn tired." replied Zell.

"Tired? Okay, well go with that." Said Irvine, the sarcasm dripping from his voice.

"Stop it you two." Said Quistis. "You are SeeDs. Act like them.

"C'mon people, stop bickering. Now, MORE IDEAS PLEASE!" yelled Selphie.

"How 'bout you not yell like that? That would help. Bet the whole garden is up now." Said Irvine.

"Well, where should we have it? Hands up for training center." Selphie said. Squall, Selphie, Irvine and Quistis put their hands up.

"Okay, that's four for training center which would leave two for the Quad. Kinda sad. The Quad just got a new addition too… ah, but so did the training center, so it evens out. Yay! First decision made! And I like Squally's idea of the contest too!" exclaimed Selphie.

"Please do not call me that." Squall said.

"Squally, Squally, Squally, Squally, Squally, Squally, Squally!" teased Selphie.

"Cut it out." Squall actually let out a laugh.

"Ooooooooooh, I haven't heard you laugh in a long time… that is, saying last night was a long time ago." Rinoa said. Squall laughed again.

They spent a couple hours laughing and reminiscing about the past, bouts with Ultima Weapon, Omega Weapon, Ultimica, and other past experiences.

"…no Selphie, you did look dumb when you were dressed up as a Galibadian soldier at their base. But not as dumb as Squall would have looked." Zell said.

"No, he would look sexy!" said Rinoa.

"Whatever. I don't need to talk about the past or hear what could have happened. I'm gone." Said Squall, and started to leave.

"No! Squally, don't go!" Said Selphie, but was too late. Squall had already left.

Squall walked around the garden for a while. People were finally up, and some were running around exercising. Squall's stomach rumbled and he decided to go to the cafeteria for breakfast. Today was Sunday, which meant there were pancakes. Squall loved the Garden's pancakes. Dusted with powdered sugar, smothered with butter and maple syrup… Squall started to run for the cafeteria. He almost plowed over a junior student, and two female senior SeeDs.

"HEY! WATCH IT!" yelled a rather busty blonde senior.

"Not sorry. You should watch out for crazy students on pancake Sunday." Said Squall back, not slowing down. But when he got to the cafeteria, he saw something that made him stop dead in his tracks. Seifer, Rajin, and Fujin standing in a triangle talking. Squall rubbed his eyes like it was actually going to help. When he opened them again, they were still there. Squall drew his gunblade, which made people start to stare at him.

"Hey, was that guy speeding? Let's get him." Seifer said. Seifer, Rajin, and Fujin ran out of the cafeteria.

"Wait. Hasn't this already happened? Seifer! Get back here!" yelled Squall. He turned around and almost ran over Xu, nearly making her drop her plate of pancakes.

"Squall, who are you talking to? Seifer is dead. And why is you're gunblade out? You know weapons are not permitted in the cafeteria." Xu informed.

"But I just saw him! He-"

"Settle down. Are you sick?" Xu felt Squall's forehead, but Squall pushed her hand away.

"I'm telling you, I saw Seifer!" said Squall. "And I'm not going crazy either." Squall tried to go around Xu, but she stood firmly in his path.

"Listen. I'm going to sit down and eat. You are going to get some pancakes, and sit down at my table and we are going to sort this out. Now go." Xu said.

"Okay." Said Squall, and headed for the exit.

"Oh no, nice try. Go that way." Xu pointed at the students formed in a line waiting for breakfast. Reluctantly, Squall went, and Xu headed for the nearest table.

"Sorry. We're out of pancakes. But there are plenty of hotdogs, would you like some?" asked the lunch lady1. With out saying a word, Squall turned on his heel, and walked to the exit.

"HEY! Where do you think you are going?" yelled Xu.

"No pancakes. You said to get some pancakes. No pancakes. Bye." Squall tried to leave, but Xu ran up to him and caught him by the collar.

"GO GET SOME FRICK'EN FOOD! THEN SIT DOWN!" screamed Xu, which made even more people stare at them. "And put away-oh give me that!" Xu yanked the Lionheart style gunblade from Squall's hands and stomped off to her table.

"Hey, give back my-"

"WHEN WE ARE DONE TALKING!" yelled Xu.

Just then, Zell, Irvine, Selphie, and Rinoa walked in the cafeteria.

"Hey, Squall! Where have you been? We were looking all over for you. This is the last place we thought you would be. Say what was that loud noise? Sounded like a constipated T-Rexaur or something." Zell said. Then he saw the hotdog in Squall's hands and bolted for the lunch line.

"Hey, do you have any hotdogs?" asked Zell.

"Sorry. That guy over there got the last one." Said lunch lady1, pointing at Squall.

"Damn! Wait, do you have any pancakes?" asked Zell

"Sorry. That girl over there got the last short stack." Said lunch lady1, pointing at Xu.

"Double Damn!"

"Eggs?"

"Sure." Zell took the plate of eggs offered to him and sat down next to Squall. Everyone now had food, and sat down. Rinoa on the other side of Squall, Quistis next to Rinoa, Selphie on the other side next to Xu, and Irvine next to Selphie.

"Alright, now explain exactly what you saw." Xu said.

"Wait, what are you talking about?" asked Rinoa.

"Shhh, he will tell you." Xu said.

"Well, it's hard to explain. Uh… oh, Zell." Squall said.

"Yeah?" said Zell, dropping a fork full of eggs down his lap. He dusted them on to the floor, and the nearby janitor gave him an evil glare.

"Do you remember the day you ran out of the cafeteria because they were out of hotdogs, and you were chased down by Seifer, Rajin, and Fujin?" asked Squall.

"Noooooo, I only got hit on the head with Rajin's stupid staff!" said Zell sarcastically.

"Okay, it was an exact reenactment of that. Right in front of me. Minus the staff to the head. And minus Zell, too." Squall said.

"Ohhhhh, did they look like ghosts? Like, all see-through and stuff?" asked Selphie.

"No. They were solid. Like they were really there. But… Seifer is dead…" Squall trailed off.

"You just need something to take your mind off of things." Xu handed back Squall's gunblade to him. "After you eat, why don't you go train? Some fighting should do you some good. I'll go with." Xu stood up, and threw her tray away in the trashcan next to her.

"Me too!" said Zell, choking on the last bite of his eggs.

"Ahhhh, I've got nothing better to do." Irvine said.

"If Squall's going, I'm going!" said Rinoa, a sinister grin on her face.

Selphie took out her nunchuckus and began swinging them around violently.

"Count me in-" Selphie met the angry glare of Xu and immediately put them away. "Err, I mean, I guess I'll go too…" said Selphie quietly.

"Then it's settled!" said Zell

"We are going to kick some monster-butt!" said Selphie.

"Thanks, Xu." Squall said.

"Now you owe me one." Said Xu, winking.

"Whatever."

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXXxX

**Gneo: So, what do you think? Well, don't just say it out loud, I can't hear you. (Unless you are REALLY loud) But for the rest of you who are not that loud, sending me a review will be good enough. **

**O.J. did it.**


	3. Squall's Mistake

**A/N: Hello. I will stop putting "Gneo:" to indicate an author's note. Because he will be in my fic, (oops, spoiler) it would be odd. Like he was talking as a part of the story, but he isn't because it's me, therefore not him, because I made him, he's my character. Now, just what the fork is a "Gneo"? Click my profile to find out… it is confusing otherwise, trust me. I almost confused myself once. Then I read my own profile, and figured it out. Don't tell my I'm crazy, I already know that. And leave me alone about Seifer's comment about "please read and review." It was out of my annoyance from seeing "please read and review" on everyone's fic's. Oh well. Please read and review.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own 343 Guilty Spark or any of its stupid, stupid annoyance.**

**Oh, by the way, this chapter is now intended for 13 and under. (I changed the sort of NC-17 part of it to a more pathetic, humorous thingy. (But that does NOT mean that this is for kids. Because it is not. Trix are. Want the NC-17 sort of original chapter? Just ask! E-mail you shall receive.)**

**Chapter three:**

**Squall's mistake**

"Hey, can you guys wait here? I need to find my weapon. Squall, help me, c'mon!" Rinoa grabbed Squall's arm and began to run to the dorms.

"Sure," said Zell. "I can wait." He sat down on the bench across from the training area.

"AHHH! ARE YOU GAY? GET OFF ME!" Screamed a male senior. Apparently, Zell did not look where he was sitting, and he plopped down right on top of a guy that was sitting there. Zell was promptly pushed off.

"Hey, are you bashing homosexuality? That's totally not cool!" yelled Selphie, who seemed to be hurt be the senior's remark.

"No, I just don't really like it when some guy just comes up to me and sits on my lap! Is it wrong to think that? Please tell me it isn't…" remarked the senior, sounding rather freaked out. He stood up and looked around at everyone, looking more and more freaked out as he studied his surroundings.

"Maybe he was trying to give you a lap dance!" announced Quistis.

"Wha-I-no!" yelled Zell.

"Ooooo… is Zell blushing? His face is red!" Said Selphie in an annoying tone.

"No! It's called embarrassment, if you weren't high off sugar extract all the time, you would know how it feels!" Screamed Zell.

Just then, as the senior was stepping backward, he bumped into a blue figure passing by. The blue figure stopped and glared at the senior with its half steel, half blue eyes.

"Human. Do you call those two soft, round, glossy objects embedded on your head eyes?" asked the blue figure.

"Err-uh-y-yes. I-I do." Replied the senior.

"Good. So do I. Must I teach you how to use them?" asked the mystery blue figure.

"Uh-n-no…" the senior spoke in a terrified tone.

"Well then, in the future prove it." The blue figure walked away into the training center.

"Okay now. Is this lap dance problem going to linger all day? Or will I see Zell give this guy a lap dance?" Asked Quistis.

"IT WASN'T A LAP DANCE!" yelled Zell and the senior together.

"Right, right, uh huh. We believe ya." Said Selphie.

"Forget it! You guys are a bunch of freaks! Get away!" The senior spun around and ran for the training center.

"Oh for Zuna's sakes, going to the training center, how could I forget my sword? How ignorant of me." The mystery blue figure was muttering to himself while running out of the training center. There was a loud thud and a splash. Everyone walked over to see what the ruckus was.

"AHHHHH! Get him off! Get him off! I'm not gay!" screamed the senior, who was soaked from head to toe. The senior stripped off his shirt and pants and began slamming them on the ground. Girls nearby either stopped dead and stared or ran away squealing. Guys yelled at him.

"What the hell are you doing?" yelled a random guy.

"Get him off!" yelled the senior, now trying to ring out his shirt.

"Ow! StOp iT HuMaN! SeTtLe DoWn!" said a bubbly voice that seemed to come from the wet clothes.

"Hey guys, thanks for waiting-… what the heck is going on here?" asked Rinoa.

"And why is that guy only wearing his boxers? That's… inappropriate." Squall said.

All of a sudden, the senior jumped back. He stared at his clothes on the ground, and they started to move. All the water was crawling out of the clothes, and gathering in a puddle. The puddle began to climb up into the air, and then it began to take shape. Finally it formed into the mystery blue figure from before. It glared at the senior.

"What did I say about using your eyes human?" asked the blue figure, who seemed to be a bit pissed off.

"…AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed the senior, and ran into the training center.

"No, I don't believe that's what I said…" the blue figure replied, scratching his head.

"Wait. What the heck is happening here? Or do I even want to know?" Squall asked.

"Oh, uh, well you see sir, this human does not know how to utilize his eyes. I think, when used correctly they would help you not run into a Doku and have him turn into his water form on accident." The Doku said.

"Dok-what? Water form? I'm confused, who are you?" Rinoa asked.

"My apologies, I have not properly introduced myself. I am Gneo from the planet Zuna. I'm sure at least one of you humans knows of the student exchange program, do you not?" asked Gneo.

"What? Oh no, but that doesn't mean…" Xu trailed off.

XxX

A couple weeks ago, Headmaster's office, Xu's POV

XxX

"Sir, please get away from the computer, you've had too much saki." I told Cid.

"No, no, it's quite alright Xu. I have been (hiccup) meaning to do this student-exchange thingy for a while now." Cid told me, spilling saki on his lap.

"Um, don't you mean 'thought exchange' program? And with people on this planet for god's sakes!" I said looking at the computer screen, seeing names and planets I could not even pronounce.

"Well, I changed my (hic) mind. Hmmmm… Gneo? Doesn't care where he's going… from planet Zuna? What a pretty (hic) name…" Cid was totally delirious.

"Come on sir, get off before you do something stupid…" I saw him click Gneo's name.

"Now, who to send? Oh, I know, Nida said he needed to go somewhere, why don't I send him to (hic) Zuna? He will be pleased." Cid clicked on Nida's name, then on the word 'exchange.'

"No sir! He said he needed to go to the restroom! Not-"

"Well I would like to go to planet (hic) restroom too, but I can't. I'm (hic, hic) not a student." Cid cut me off.

I gawked at him in horror. Nida was going to another planet, and there was nothing I could do…

XxX

End POV

XxX

"And that's what happened." Xu told everybody.

"So that's where Nida's been lately." Said Squall.

"B-bu-but that means…" Zell trailed off.

XxX

Same time, Planet Zuna

XxX

"Why hello there, human! Do not be afraid, I will not hurt you. Why are you not at the center of learning, human? Don't worry, I have a friend that can help you… ORACLE!" The green blob-like alien said. In a flash of yellow light, a little orb shaped robot that had had a voice so annoying, it just made you want to pull out a rocket launcher and blow it to bits appeared.

"Hello. I am 343-Guilty Spark. Another reclaimer? Splendid! How may I be of service?" It said in its annoying voice, making a little blue flash of light out from the center as it just hovered there.

"Why do I have a sudden urge to blow you to bits with a rocket launcher?" Asked Nida.

"Ah-heh-heh, don't mind that, human. Oracle, I want you to send this human to the learning center. Well human, this is where our roads end. I bid you farewell." The green blob turned and left.

"WAIT! Don't leave me here with this floating-… thing!" screamed Nida.

"Don't worry reclaimer. I will fill you in with a brief history of this planet on the warp." Said Guilty Spark.

"NOOOOOOO!" Nida's voice was droned out as he and the little robot disappeared in the same flash of yellow light in which it came.

XxX

End planet Zuna, back to Earth

XxX

"Don't worry guys, I'm sure he's alright." Said Zell.

"I'm not so sure… hey c'mon let's go!" yelled Selphie, and ran into the hallway leading to the training center.

Everyone but Squall, Rinoa, and Gneo followed Selphie into the training center.

"So, uh- Gneo, are you going into the training center? It would be interesting to see how someone from another planet fights." Said Squall.

"Yes, but I just forgot my sword, Kazama. Normally Kazama is always in a sheath on my back. But this learning center has so many damn restrictions and other little rules." Answered Gneo.

"You named your sword?" Rinoa asked. Gneo shuddered.

"You're kidding, right? I already told you its name. Isn't it obvious after that?" Gneo asked.

"Geez, you don't have to be so mean about it, I was just asking a question." Snarked Rinoa

"A question that was already answered, human!" Gneo said to Rinoa.

"C'mon Squall, let's go." Rinoa stuck her tongue out at Gneo and walked into the training center, pulling on Squall's arm.

"Hey, will you meet us in the training center after you find your sword?" Squall yelled back to Gneo.

"…Call it a head start!" Replied Gneo.

XxX

Thirty minutes later, training center

XxX

"Nice one, commander!" said Xu as Squall's gunblade exited out of the back of an Ochu.

"Thanks. Even the new monsters added here seem weak." Replied Squall.

"Hey! Another Ochu at six o'clock!" yelled Zell, and everybody ran for it.

"Hey! Squall… over here, stupid!" said Rinoa. She was standing by the entrance to the 'secret meeting place.' She was beckoning him closer with one finger.

Meanwhile, Xu, Zell, Irvine, Quistis, and Selphie were having a hard time with their Ochu. Selphie was already getting sick from the monster's poison. Zell had punctured it with his left fist, and was fishing around for something inside of it.

"C'mon, where is it?" Zell said to himself.

"Zell, what the hell are you doing? You will get terribly poisoned! Get your hand out of it!" Yelled Quistis.

"Say, where's Squall when you need him? Or Rinoa? Oh, I get it. They're probably making out in the secret area." Said Zell, still felling the slimy insides of the Ochu. It seemed to be immobilized because of it, but it was still trying to smack Zell with its tentacles. Trying, but failing miserably.

"Say what? Oh, I can't miss this…" Quistis turned around and ran to the secret area.

"I can't believe this, I'm going too." Selphie turned and followed Quistis.

"I-uh-um-that's uh- inappropriate. I um-should check it out." Xu followed after the two girls.

"What? Oh that's frick'en weak, man." Said Zell.

Irvine pumped his shotgun once, walked right up to the Ochu, (it didn't seem too much willing to fight with someone's arm inside of it) stuck his gun in its big gaping mouth, and pulled the trigger. Ochu guts, which mainly consist of green goop, and other gross green things flew everywhere, making it look like Irvine was finger painting his face with green slime. The Ochu stopped it's moving, although there wasn't much to stop in the first place. Zell took his fist out of the Ochu's sides.

"Oh great…" Zell leaped headfirst into the Ochu's dead gaping mouth.

"You're a strange one…" Irvine said, but Zell did not hear him, he was too busy digging around inside of the Ochu. Irvine walked over to Xu, Quistis, and Selphie, who were each taking turns peeking into the room where Squall and Rinoa were making out. Irvine sneaked a peak.

They were both leaning against a wall, Squall's back on the wall. Squall started to move his right hand slowly down her back, down her leg, up and around…

Rinoa lightly smacked his hand.

"No touchy…" Rinoa whispered, and then continued indulging her tongue in Squall's mouth.

"Ohhhh… a sly one with the fingers, eh?" Irvine said quietly. "I've seen enough." Irvine picked a random direction and walked away.

"Look, Selphie, he's just standing there. He is not even doing anything." Quistis moved aside so Selphie could peek in.

Squall now was vigorously doing nothing at all. She couldn't help but give a slight noise of annoyance. Squall did not pick this up. He stood there almost oblivious to the fact that he was kissing his girlfriend. No, that was a lie. Rinoa was kissing him. He just stood there acting like a fool. He knew barely anything about sex anyway. If it was fighting he was dealing with, that would be a very different situation.

"Oh my! I did not just see Squall's hand try to go for …Rinoa's…ugh…" Selphie stopped peeking and ran a few steps away before falling to her knees puking into a nearby bush.

"Oh, Selphie… that poison must have really gotten to her... among other things." Said Quistis walking over to where Selphie was, leaving a perverted Xu bending over watching Squall perfectly acting like a wall for Rinoa.

"Hey guys, ya' miss me?" said Zell, waving at his friends. Xu turned from the door.

"Zell, what on earth were you doing with that Ochu? You're filthy!" Xu said. She was right. Zell was half covered with thick, sticky green goop.

"Oh, I was just looking for this." Zell proudly displayed a disfigured hotdog covered with green slime. "Th' little asshole stole it from me yesterday, so I was surprised it was still there! Well, I sure told him!" Zell took a big bite out of the slime-covered hotdog. Selphie turned just in time to see him do this.

"Oh my… my stomach..." Selphie turned and re-commenced puking her brains out. Quistis and Xu had no comment, so Quistis returned to try to cure Selphie by giving her an elixir, and Xu returned to peeking in at Squall and Rinoa.

He was still doing absolutely nothing. Not even moving, really. He did have his arms around her waist. Wow, that was accomplishing a lot. Rinoa stopped kissing Squall and pulled her out of his arms.

"What the hell are you doing?" Rinoa yelled at him, a disgusted look covering her face.

"I-uh-what do you mean? Nothing!" Squall said, confusion present in his mind.

"Wow, for once you're actually right." Rinoa said, slapping him hard on the face. She ran out of the room with her fists tightened.

"Rinoa, wait-stop!" yelled Squall after her.

Rinoa stopped dead in her tracks. She was filled with hate and tension. She slowly turned around, a death glare ringing deep within her eyes.

"What was that?" Rinoa said sarcastically, "stop? What, you expect me to do for you what you are so good at already? Just stop-and do nothing! You suck at kissing! I have told you this many times! How can you not do a single thing, and not learn from it? Is it because it doesn't have anything to do with a stupid gunblade!" Rinoa yelled at him. She turned around, tears re-appearing on her face, and she ran.

"No, stop!" yelled Squall.

"NO! Not for you Squall!" she was choking on her tears. "I'll never stop for you! Never!"

XxX

**So, what do you think? I know, I haven't posted in a very long time… I'm sorry, it's just that school is very demanding, and I hate history class. We just re-learn the Civil War 153253.53476 quadrillion (yes, that's a real word) times. And maybe World War I and II a couple times, but ever the Vietnam War? NOOOOO! We can't tell our own people that we, the "proud" United States of America lost a frick'en war, and tried to go into Louse for all of it's opium can we? Or that's EXACTLY one of the reasons that we are in Afghanistan searching its sands for that big, pretty yellow flower? (Opium flowers like the desert. I don't know why, so don't ask me. If you really want to know, why don't you ask one?) No, what would we do with drugs? Duh, give them to the C.I.A. so they can sell them on the Black Market for profit, because they are not funded by the government! Oh! I'm sorry, went off a little bit there didn't I? Well, I apologize. Please tell me what you think of this chapter. (And not that it's longer this time, Black Chaos Lightning-999, I already know that. Word count has its advantages.)**

**You know, I really should not put a period at the end of "( )" it makes it look like a breast. Thank Black Chaos Lightning-999 for that bit of info. Isn't it amazing what you can do with a graphing calculator when you are bored? O.J. did it.**


	4. The um err fourth chapter

**A/N: Hey there! You know what? I'm typing up the same story that you are reading on your computer screen. Wow, what a mindfuck!**

Chapter 4:

The… um-err-fourth chapter 

(Dum, dum, dum)

Rinoa was running so fast, she couldn't see where she was going. The tears welled up in her eyes made everything a blur. The tears in her throat made it hard to breath. She thought she saw a blue figure in front of her, but her eyes were drenched with tears, obscuring her vision. She lost Squall within seconds. Squall stopped to catch his breath. He could not see Rinoa. He couldn't think, couldn't move, or do anything. He just stood there, and slowly, the thought of him losing the one- the only one he loved started to whisper into his mind the possibility of it being true. Squall did not care about anything anymore. He whipped out his gunblade out of its sheath, and tried to impale himself upon its blade. But he only got so far before something blue grabbed the hilt of the sword, and pulled it away from Squall. Squall fell to his knees.

"Ow! Whoa-who… where's my gunblade?" Squall tried standing up, but failed, so he was satisfied with just sitting down holding the bleeding hole that went through thirty-percent of his body.

"Now, now, now. We wouldn't have wanted that to happen, would we? That would leave a very sad girl, wouldn't it? Yes, I do believe it would." Said an alien voice from which Squall could not find its origin.

"Hey, who are you? Do I know you?" Squall said, feeling rather stupid talking to someone that did not seem to be there.

"What? You humans have _that_ short of a memory span? Maybe I should help you instead of asking you questions." The voice said.

Squall's eyes widened, as a white hole was ripped open in thin air. A blue figure carrying a strange blade stepped out. The sword had six sickle shaped objects sticking out of it, three on both sides. Its holder gave Squall a look of appraisal.

"Hey… you're that one guy from before. Gneo, right?" Squall asked.

"Hmmm… so you do have a memory span. Okay, maybe I will question you." Gneo offered a hand to help him up. Squall did not refuse the offer.

"But first, let's stop this bleeding, shall we?" Gneo grabbed the bottom of Squall's shirt, and pulled it up. This startled Squall, and he jumped back.

"Don't worry, human. I won't hurt you. And you don't have to worry about me making a move on you either. Now hold up your shirt for a second." Gneo said. Squall hesitated, but slowly did as he was told. The bleeding wasn't that bad, but it didn't tickle either. With a simple touch of his palm, Gneo froze the cut, and no more blood came out.

"There, that should do it. You can take the cold, right?" Gneo asked Squall.

"Sure." Squall said.

"Um… you can put you're shirt down now." Gneo said.

"Uh, right." Squall let go of his shirt. "Hey, how did you do that? The freezing, I mean."

"Sorry, but this is my turn to ask questions." Gneo said. He turned into his water form, becoming semi-transparent. He was still standing, and fully detailed. Except he was see-through. The ground around the two started to frost over, covering an area of about fifteen square feet. Squall did not seem to mind, until walls of jagged ice came up all around them, that is. They towered about ten feet above them. Gneo stood there, studying the expression of confusion on his face. Out of reflex, Squall lunged foreword and began punching Gneo in the face. Squall was able to penetrate Gneo's skull. But it just splashed back into place. Gneo lifted his arm, and opened a portal where Squall was punching. Squall fell all the way into the portal, so Gneo opened the exit portal four feet in front of him. So basically, it would have the same outcome if Squall just backed up four feet. He stumbled to the side, very confused, and slipped on some ice. He fell on his back, but was lucky enough to not hit his head. He could not move. Well, actually he could, but not without hurting himself. He lay motionless and numb, not knowing what was going on in the outside world. When he finally opened his eyes, Gneo's face was hovering above him. He was not in his water form anymore.

"Where am I?" Squall asked softly.

"The same place you were fifteen seconds ago." Gneo answered, backing up.

"S-s-so c-c-cold…" Squall mumbled. He looked around. He tried to move. He heard the sound of ice clacking against each other. He looked down. He saw that he was in shackles of ice. He was chained to the wall, bound by ice to his wrists and ankles. He tried to walk forward to Gneo, but the chains only extended a few feet.

"I thought you said you could take the cold." Gneo said.

"How the hell should I have known that I would be chained to a frigg'en wall?" Squall asked.

"My time for questions. When did you think suicide would answer your problems?" Gneo asked.

"Huh?" Squall was confused.

"Don't play dumb. If I had not confiscated your sword-gun thingy, you would not be chained to a wall right now." Gneo retorted.

"Oh, how ever my I thank you?" Squall answered, sarcasm dripping from his lips.

"By listening to and answering my questions, and shutting the hell up whilst I do so." Gneo said. Squall did not say anything. Gneo nodded, and then began pacing back and forth.

"So. You are angry, no? What is this felling that makes you want to end your life?" Gneo asked.

"Rinoa hates me. Without her, I don't feel like living." Squall stared at the ground, remembering how she ran away from him.

"MY GOD! Just because you suck at kissing does not mean you just impale yourself with a sword, you pussy!" Gneo exclaimed.

"Wha-hey! How do you know?" Squall.

"Let's see… oh yeah, I met this cowboy-like dude, what's his name? I think it 'Pervine' or something like that." Gneo asked.

"Close enough." Squall laughed. "It's Irvine."

"Oh. Yes, that's it. Now, on to business. What is your guess on your girlfriend's thoughts?" Gneo asked.

"Thoughts? On what?" Squall asked. Gneo rolled his eyes.

"You, stupid." Gneo said curtly.

"She hates me." Squall said in dismal, sitting down and hanging his head low.

"Tch. Hardly. So you can't kiss. After a few tears, which, by the way, I'm surprised that that's why she was crying in the first place, she'll get over it. Oh, to answer any future questions about how I know she was crying, she almost plowed me over while she was running. Anyway, how do you think killing yourself would help it anyway? She would think it was her fault for you going all suicidal and crap, and it would make the rest of her life a miserable, living hell. If she even decided to live the rest of it, that is." Gneo said. Squall gave no reply. He knew Gneo was right. He simply tried to choose the easy way out of it.

"Can you release me now? This is uncomfortable." Squall said.

"I don't know…" Gneo said, turning his back.

"Alright, I promise to not put my own life in jeopardy… on purpose that is." Squall replied. Gneo nodded. He then snapped his fingers, and the ice shackles imprisoning Squall shattered, leaving the air sparkling with a shower of blue ice, each side of the ice shards showing reflections of the surrounding area from oblique angles. Gneo turned around, and beads holding the blue dreadlocks in placed clacked against each other, sending the noise to echo against the ice walls. Gneo stepped forward to Squall. He stared at Squall oddly for a while, and then finally offered his hand. Squall accepted.

"So-what about this…uh…ice…thing…?" Squall asked after Gneo helped Squall up. They were still trapped inside by the walls of ice.

"That's easy." Said Gneo. He clapped his hands, and the shimmering ice turned to glistening water, though still stayed erect. After a few seconds, the water splashed down to the ground, and instantly evaporated.

"TAKE THIS! THUNDAGA!" Selphie and everyone else were standing where the walls of ice used to be. Selphie's Nunchuckus were glowing vibrant yellow, and she looked pissed off.

"Wait, Selphie-no!" Squall started for Selphie, but he was too late. Strange markings appeared under Gneo.

"What is this sorcery! I can't move…" Gneo was still in his water form. A large jolt of electricity shot through Gneo, sending him flying upward super fast. But before Gneo's head could smash up against the ceiling, a white spot appeared above him, and another in front of Selphie.

"Whoa! What's tha-" before Selphie could finish, Gneo went through the white hole in the air, and came out through the hole right in front of her. He smashed down on the ground, barely inches away from her. He stood up, and then slowly converted back to his physical form, black scorch marks could be seen on him while he was changing from his feet, slowly up to his head. He glared angrily into Selphie's eyes.

"HUMAN! What the hell was that for!" Gneo screamed. Selphie just stared at Gneo. Her eyes were sparkly, and not from the small bit of makeup.

"Ohmigod! That was soooooooooo cool! Do it again! Do it again!" Selphie jumped up and down like a crazed bunny, madly clapping her hands.

"Huh? You mean-hey!" Gneo turned around to see Irvine standing there.

"Hey! I was just look'in at that gun o' yer's, there. Okay, so I was just gonna touch it…"

"What do you want with my rail-driver!" Gneo cut Irvine off. He reached over his sword sling and grabbed the rail driver off. He aimed it at Irvine, and pressed a button. A long metal prong slowly came out of the muzzle of the gun, and mini bolts of electricity came out. **(A/N: for those of you who do not know what a rail-driver is, do not worry. It will be explained later. All you need to know right now is that it is a hell of a big gun. The "pronged end" basically looks like an oversized tuning fork, where the slugs come out of)**

"Wow! A rail-driver! We have those on this planet… but they are on tanks… and you need to reload with each shot." Irvine did not notice that there was a one hundred and twenty-five pound gun being aimed at him. He was lost in the rail-driver.

"Not with this baby…" Gneo patted the gun.

"How does it work?" Quistis asked. Gneo grinned.

"Glad you asked, miss." Gneo turned around, and aimed at a group of small trees about twenty yards away. He tilted his head to peer through the scope.

"You see, it works like magic…" he pulled in and held the trigger for a few seconds. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzn! The end of the huge gun charged up with electricity.

"Now you see it…" Gneo released the trigger, sending a large sparking metal slug flying through the air. It hit the base of the trees, and blew up on contact. The trees flew ten feet through the air before landing in a burning heap on the ground.

"Now you don't."

"Yes I do." Selphie said. "It's over there in flames…" she pointed at the wreckage.

"No you don't!" Gneo pointed the gun at Selphie and held the trigger in, charging it up.

"Wow! Where can I get one of those?" Irvine asked Gneo excitedly.

"…Depends on how far you are willing to travel." Gneo replied.

"Huh? Oh, I get it." Irvine replied.

'There it is! There's the monster! Let's get'em!" A random student yelled. A group of three guys and two girls started for Gneo.

"Get away!" Gneo yelled. "Oh, Pervine, here." Gneo said.

"Irvine" Irvine replied.

"Same thing." Selphie said as she walked over to a pile of rocks and sat down.

"Yeah, gotcha, here, catch." Gneo tossed the rail-driver to Irvine, who fell backwards on his butt. He stood up slowly, and then dragged the gun back towards a few rocks where Selphie, Quistis, and Zell were sitting. Zell was eating popcorn. Irvine sat down, and began studying the massive rail-driver.

"Hey have you guys seen Mr. Whatever?" Quistis asked.

"No. Probably looking for Miss Dance With Me Right Now." Zell said through a mouthful of popcorn.

"Oh. Okay."

"Zell, pass the pop-… hey! Where did you even get that popcorn?" Selphie asked.

"I dunno. I just sort of found it here." Zell said, chomping loudly on a handful of popcorn.

"Eeeeeew! That's gross!" Selphie stuck out her tongue.

The mob of people approached Gneo. Out of the three guys, two had brown hair and were rather short compared to Gneo. One of them had a fifty caliber pistol, the other a S.A.A. **(For those of you who are not weaponry geeks, a fifty cal. pistol is the biggest pistol out there. And a S.A.A. is basically a revolver. You may now shoot me for distracting you from the story with my author's notes)** One of the two girls was the same busty blonde that Squall ran into that morning. She had a chain whip with a sickle at the end. The other girl had long blackish hair, a white shirt and a black skirt that had single leather strap that went over the left shoulder, like a suspender. She had metal studded gloves, which most likely meant she used her fists. The guy with long blonde hair seemed to be the ringleader as he stepped foreword and drew his Flamberge off of the sheath on his back.

"C'mon! Knock'em dead!" Selphie cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled.

"What, have you brainwashed those people to be your cheerleaders?" The blonde guy asked.

"Cheerleaders? Yes!" Quistis jumped up, and zipped up her shirt almost all the way up, bearing a large amount of cleavage.

"Go Gneo, go Gneo, go, go, go!" Quistis yelled as she hopped up and down. Gneo tried not to stare as Quistis's chest went bouncy-bounce.

"Gasp! You brainwashed Miss Treppie into being your sex slave? Die, you sick freak!" the girl with blackish hair lunged foreword with a straight punch. Gneo opened two portals, one in front of the girl's face, and one in front of his. The girl's hand went through the portal that, if it were not there, would have connected with Gneo's face. Instead, it connected with her nose. There was a loud crack-pop sound, and the girl grabbed onto and held her nose, as if it was going to fix it.

"My nobe! It's boken! Yoo boke my nobe!" tears welled up in the girls eyes. She turned around and ran away screaming.

"Gneo, don't hurt these people too much, they are students here after all." Quistis said.

"Gotcha." Gneo replied.

"So, you have a name? Gneo is it? How about Gay-know? The now-it-all of gayness!" The blonde guy said.

"Oh my gosh… you hurt Tifa! Take this!" The busty blonde cracked her whip at Gneo. It struck him in the forehead, causing a gash that stared bleeding green blood down his shirt.

"Hey! This is my favorite shirt, you bitch!" Gneo yelled as he jumped backward.

"I am not a bitch!" The busty blonde chased after Gneo, cracking his whip frantically. Gneo dodged left and right, not wanting to get hit again. Then, as Gneo saw the whip pass over his right shoulder, he reached up and grabbed the section where the chain connected to the spike. He started to work his water magic, sending water slowly trickling down the whip. The girl tugged at her whip.

"Hey! Let go! Give it back! Ewww! Why is this all wet?" The blonde yelled.

"Want it back? Fine." Gneo froze the whip, causing the blonde's hands to slip off of the handle. She fell backwards onto her butt.

"Tell me, Miss balloon boobs, are you in that position a lot? Because if you are, you and I have to party some time." Gneo tossed the whip aside, which was now frozen into a pole. It broke in half upon impact with the ground.

"What? Never! That's gross!" the girl stood up, and dusted off her pants by smacking them with her hands. "Wait for me Tifa!" she turned around and ran.

"Awwww… she was kinda cute, too…" Gneo said.

"FREEZE!" Gneo felt the cold steel of a pistol on his back. "Didn't your mother tell you who to treat women?" he dug the pistol into Gneo's back. Gneo memorized where exactly the pistol was on his back, closed his eyes, and slowly raised his hands.

"That's right, keep going…" the guy twisted the pistol on his back.

Gneo quickly turned around and hit the gun with the back of his right arm. The guy's arm swung to the side for a second, then came back with a pistol whip. Gneo ducked under the mêlée attack, and used his current crouching stance to spring forward and elbow him in the side of the ribs.

"Ah! You little…" he stumbled back, and with his empty hand he held his ribs where Gneo's elbow had grazed him, and with his other hand, he tried to come back with aiming his pistol at Gneo. Gneo lurched forward and grabbed the hammer of the pistol with his right hand, and the butt of the gun with his left. He then pulled the side of the pistol into his chest, parallel with his solar plexus. A shot was fired, but it was parallel with Gneo, so it just hit and ricocheted off the ground. Gneo then turned the pistol inward toward his opponent as hard as he could, and it slipped out of his grasp. Gneo then waved his enemy's own weapon manically at him. Gneo then grabbed and squeezed the top of the slide of the pistol as hard as he could, waited to here a click, then pulled the entire slide shaft completely off.

"Waaaaaaaahahahaha! What now? What now, beeeee-och?" Gneo said crazily.

"Ahhh!" the guy who once had a pistol ran away.

"Wow, what a piece of crap." Gneo threw the disassembled pistol down.

"Alright. That settles it. Remind me to ask Gneo what kind of martial arts he's in." Zell said, taking a break from his popcorn.

"Alright Gneo! Whoo! Booyaka!" Selphie exclaimed.

"Three down, one to go!" Quistis yelled. Gneo did not look at her, because he knew she was probably bouncing up and down.

"You mean two, right Miss blonde? Wow you are desperate. You should be on that one show, "Desperate Housewives." Selphie said.

"So, Squall wouldn't show me more affection then Zell would." Quistis said.

"What! I wouldn't show you any in the first place!" Zell yelled.

"Bingo." Replied Quistis. It took Zell a while to figure it out.

"Alright, smart ass, no more playing around." The guy with the revolver said. He put a bullet into one of the six chambers. He then gave the chamber a spin, aimed at Gneo, waited a few seconds, and then pulled the trigger. Click. Nothing.

"What? That shouldn't have happened…" he said.

"Why did you try that stupid trick? That's a S.A.A. you got there, isn't it? A Single Action Army, nice gun, yes very good. For looks, that is. When you manually fed a bullet into the chamber, what were the chances of getting it? One in six chances are not usually in your favor. You were just asking to get your gun locked up." Gneo said.

"Ahhhh! Shut your blue mouth up!" The blonde guy ran forward, his Flamberge shining with the fake light from the ceiling lights. He swung his sword upward, missed, he went for a stab, and succeeded in impaling Gneo through his stomach. His stomach wasn't solid, of coarse. The rest of him was, though.

"Oh, no, you beat me…" Gneo bluffed, falling over. The sword was still in his stomach. The blonde guy thought he won, so he let go of the sword.

"That was easy enough." He said. Gneo then jumped up, turned his stomach to ice, while the sword was still frozen in place, he punched the sword downward making it break in half, turned his stomach back to normal, pulled the other half out of him, then turned his stomach back to normal.

"Surprise!" Gneo exclaimed. He then threw the broken end of the sword at the blonde's shoulder. It severed the flesh, and dark red stated to stain his white shirt.

"Ahhh! Damn! My favorite shirt!" he yelled, holding his bleeding appendage.

"Now you know how I feel!" Gneo replied.

"It's up to you now, Jack!" said the blonde, and ran away pretty fast for a guy who was losing a pint of blood or two.

"Jack, huh? Well, pleasure to beat you today, Jack." Gneo rushed forward at Jack. As Gneo drew nearer, Jack braced for impact. Just as Gneo came within inches, he threw a punch, and Jack put his arms up in an 'X' shape for defense. Just an inch away from Jack, Gneo opened up a portal in front of, and right behind Jack. Gneo went through the one in front of him, and ended up behind him. After a few seconds of standing there, Gneo crossed his arms in boredom. Gneo's back was to Jack's. After a few more seconds, Jack summoned up the courage to take a peek behind his defenses.

"Huh? Where-"

"I'm over here, shit-for-brains. I mean Jack." Gneo muttered. Jack turned around, held the end of the barrel of his S.A.A. with his right hand, and tried to smash Gneo on the back of the head with the butt of the gun. Gneo looked up just in time to jump backwards into Jack. It knocked the revolver out of his hands, and it fell with a clunk to the ground. Gneo jumped and spun around, and landed on his left leg. He sunk downward upon landing, and turned his right leg into water, then froze it into ice. He used the momentum from landing on his left leg to spring upward, and sent his frozen leg into Jack's stomach. Jack fell limp over Gneo's body, one arm folded over Gneo's shoulder. Jack gasped for breath, as he could not stand up. Gneo grabbed the arm hanging on him, and pulled Jack upward, flipping him over his shoulder. Jack landed on his back with a thud and a gasp for breath.

"Have fun trying to breathe!" Gneo replied. He walked over to where Zell, Irvine, Quistis, and Selphie were sitting. He sat down with them.

"That was cool! I would've joined, but it wasn't my fight." Selphie said.

"I think it was a brilliant display of skill at close range fighting and magic talent." Quistis said, scooting over to Gneo and leaning on his shoulder.

"Um, I don't know how to say this, but I just can't. Sorry." Gneo said. He grabbed the zipper of Quistis's shirt and zipped it down to cover up her chest. She stopped leaning on him, and scooted away from him.

"Will I ever find a special guy?" Quistis thought aloud.

"Wouldn't it be cooler to find that special girl?" Gneo suggested.

"Hey! That's not funny!" Quistis stood up and yelled.

"Heh, heh, I thought it was. What about you, Irvine?" Zell asked.

"Huh? What-oh the fight's over?" Irvine looked up from the rail-driver.

"You didn't even watch it? You totally missed it!" Selphie exclaimed.

"I guess. You guys wanna look for Squall and Rinoa?" Zell asked.

"I'm hungry. Can we eat something?" Gneo asked.

"Wait. Tell me how this gun o' yer's works. Where does the energy come from?" Irvine asked. Gneo got up, and sat down next to Irvine. He pushed a button near the butt of the gun, and a glowing green cylinder popped out. Gneo held the glowing object in front of Irvine.

"Now… this baby right here… holds an immense amount of energy. It's got a mixture of compressed liquid iron, and popalala." Gneo said.

"What the hell is popalala?" Irvine asked.

"Only on my planet. It's basically the battery used to power up the magnets used inside to fire huge metal slugs at extremely high velocities." Gneo said.

"Wow." Irvine replied.

"And make big boom." Gneo stood up, and cracked his back. He then relieved Irvine of the weight of the rail-driver on his lap. He swung the leather strap over his shoulder, and let the gun rest over his sword sheath on his back.

"C'mon let's go. The faster we find them, the faster I can eat." Gneo said.

"Alrighty!" Selphie yelled. They all stood up and began to start the search.

**XxX**

**Boy, did that take a while! Sorry about that, it's hard to get at a computer at school when you have been wrongfully accused for looking up pornography twice. Trust me, it sucks. Not cool. I have a computer at home, but no Internet. So please tell me what you think of this chapter, I am open to anything. Except meaningless criticism. I get that enough from my school's authoritative figures, thank you very much.**

**O/J. did it**


	5. Gneo's Mistake

**A/N: Hiya! I hope you have liked my story so far; I've worked hard on it. Sorry if it's "too bloody" or "swears too much" or there's "too much fighting" or it "eats it's dandruff." Get used to it. (There's a warning for minors) OH! I almost forgot, by the way, people; you should really check out this author called "Shadowrules" two of _her_ stories I've read are great. (Just my opinion, please don't bombard me with reviews/e-mails saying I'm trying to sway the public's opinion or some politically correct crap like that) They are "Haunted" and "Alone" both are FF8, so you might like them. (Haunted is finished, but there is a sequel, it's called "Wings") Please read review them, they are both great. (Again, my opinion not meant to bias others. How many people advertise other people's stories in their own? I haven't seen many. Doesn't that make me a Good Samaritan?)**

**Chapter five:**

**Gneo's Mistake**

(Oops-a-daisy)

"Alright, who's going with who and where?" Selphie asked.

"I'm with Gneo!" Quistis said as she hugged onto Gneo.

"No, you're not." Gneo said as he gently pushed her away. Quistis frowned, giving Gneo the puppy dog look. Within a second, Gneo quickly devised a plan.

"I'd rather go with him-" Gneo pulled Zell to his side, "he's better looking." Zell gave a weak smile.

"Uh-um-thanks…I think." Zell felt slightly uncomfortable with the blue creature hanging on to his arm.

"Well, well, then. I guess it means I'm stuck again with a group of unbelievably beautiful women. I must say, I'm one lucky guy…" Irvine said as he threw his arms around Quistis and Selphie's necks.

"Dream on, cowboy." Selphie said as she ducked out of Irvine's grasp and started walking away.

"Hey, wait up!" Quistis said as she ran after her. Irvine followed as well, leaving Gneo and Zell standing by the rocks where the fight took place earlier.

"Oh, okay guys, why don't we choose teams and figure out a way to go?" Zell said in a sarcastic tone.

"Oh, gee Zell that's a great idea! ButIwon'tlistentoyoubecauseIhavetwenty-threemillionpoundsofsugarpumpingthroughmyveinsallthetime, and I-la-la-la-la-la-what's going on? Hey! Is that a piece of candy I see three miles away from here? La-la-la-la-la-MINE!" Zell said in a high-pitched tone, trying his best to mock that of Selphie's, while holding his hands together near his face and rapidly flapping his eyelashes. Gneo laughed.

"Alright, you wanna go…….this way?" Zell pointed in the opposite direction that the others went in.

"Sure. Unless you wanna make out in that pile of rocks right there." Gneo pointed at a pile of rocks.

"Uh-no-er-thanks, I-ah-…I'll get a head start." Zell ran off in the direction he was pointing. Gneo started laughing harder.

"Ha-ha, oh man, something tells me my visit on this planet will be a funny one." Gneo thought aloud. He unzipped his black and green leather jacket, bearing toned, blue flesh. There was a large amount of tally marks and strange symbols carved into his chest.

"Five from this planet…" Gneo slowly took out a knife from a sheath on his right pant leg. It sang as it was freed from it's metal encasing, bringing a metal ringing song to bounce off of the trees. He brought the sharp gray blade to the right side of his chest, and pressed the knife softly into himself. He slowly dragged the knife diagonally in a "/" shaped line, tallying off the number five on his chest. He didn't flinch a bit. Finally, he brought the blade away from him, and up to his head to examine it. He took his time to savor his own thin green blood as he slowly licked it off with an orange tongue.

"Mmmm…this tastes really sweet…I should cut down on my sugar intake…but it tastes so good…ah, oh well." Gneo finished cleaning the knife, and then sheathed it without the need to look at it as he did so.

"Now, where did that blonde dude go?" Gneo started on his way to follow Zell.

Meanwhile, Quistis, Selphie, and Irvine were having great luck in not finding Squall or Rinoa.

"Where could they be? I'm starting to get worried." Selphie said as she climbed out of a lump of bushes.

"You're just getting started worrying? I have been for an hour, now!" Quistis exclaimed.

"A worrying blonde? Never heard o' one." Irvine remarked, causing Quistis clonked to him on the head with her fist. He merely tried to block, failed, and had no reaction. Of coarse, he did react to seeing Zell crawling out of the bushes that he was standing next to.

"Hey guys!" Zell said as he picked a few thorns off of his shirt.

"Zell! What? How did you get here? Weren't you with Gneo?" Quistis ran up to Zell, helping him out of the bush.

"Thanks. Yeah, I was. But uh…" Zell stopped in mid sentence.

"Awww…did he dump you?" Irvine said.

"Screw you!" Zell yelled.

"No thank you, I have Selphie for that," Irvine said. This caused Selphie to whack Irvine very hard on the back of his head with her nunchuckus, in the same place Quistis hit him before. "OW! THAT HURT!" He yelled.

"No, it was supposed to tickle, stupid head." Selphie remarked in a sarcastic tone.

"It was just that…guys, I think Gneo is gay." Zell said out flat.

"No! No, why? Why are all the hot guys either not interested in me, or gay?"

Meanwhile…

**XxX Rinoa's POV XxX**

"Why…oh why?" I thought to myself as I ran blindly through the forest. Why did the training center have to look like a forest or jungle or whatever? It would be better if there were less thorny plants and bushes. Oh Hyne, I have to pee. Where is an outhouse when you need it? I've never been to this part of the training center before…it's so big. I'm so depressed. I'm even talking to myself about it, does that make me insane? Crazy? For Squall maybe, but…he just never tries in our relationship. No, stop thinking that…it makes you cry, Rinoa. Stop referring to yourself in third person. Or just shut up. No, you shut up. Make me, bitch! Oh no you di-'int! Ow…tree…outhouse…outhouse! I must pee! I ran up to the outhouse, and knocked hard on the door. After only waiting only a split second to check if there was anyone in there already, I opened the door, which was unlocked, and quickly jumped in, not looking at the toilet, just turning around to lock the door and pull down my short-shorts. Oops, I thought I got fully dressed today. Oh well. Must pee…I quickly sat down on the toilet. But are toilets normally this soft and warm? And what the heck is this hard thing that's coming up from underneath me? I turn my head around and…

**XxX End POV, back to normal-err…POV-thingy XxX **

"Erm…hi Rinoa." Squall said in a slow, creaky voice. All Rinoa could do is gasp. That is, before a T-Rexaur ripped off a part of the roof of the outhouse. Rinoa screamed and stood up, pulling up her shorts. But before Squall could react, the T-Rexaur stuck again. Rinoa turned around and latched on to Squall. The T-Rexaur was able to catch Rinoa by the back of her shorts. It tried to pull Rinoa up and out of the outhouse, but the hole was barley big enough for it's two front fangs, so all it succeeded in doing was tearing off her shorts, leaving a half-naked Rinoa sobbing on the floor of the outhouse.

Of course, all of this was disturbing a once peacefully sleeping Gneo at the top of a nearby tree.

"What the hell?" Gneo said as he gained balance standing up on a branch to look out to see what was so damn important as to wake him up. He rubbed his eyes, and then saw a giant T-Rexaur standing in front of an outhouse, with a pair of short-shorts hanging off of it's teeth. It took a large bite out of the outhouse, relieving it of its entire roof.

"EEEEEEEEEK! I HATE JURASSIC PARK!" Rinoa screamed.

"Hey…that sounds like that Rinoa chick…I should probably help. But I'd hate to dirty this shirt more than it already is…but then again, I am hungry." Gneo drew Kazama from it's home on his back. It sang as he removed it, greeting Gneo with a song of death.

"Ready for some food, buddy?" Gneo greeted the sword. Of course it didn't answer, so Gneo decided to take action. He ran down the branch he was standing on, not losing his balance. When he was close enough, he jumped off, landing on the beast's back. The T-Rexaur did not seem to notice Gneo's presence, until he shoved his sword straight down into its spinal chord. It didn't seem to like that. It immediately stopped trying to eat Squall and Rinoa, and focused on the task at hand. Or rather on back. As is had a sword impaling it's spine, it was fully paralyzed, so it could do nothing to help itself. It fell over onto the outhouse, somehow not crushing it. All it did was block the door and the hole it ripped open in the roof.

"Bull's-eye. Hi T-Rexaur! Wanna have a brain-freeze? Literally? Of course you do." Gneo dug the sword deeper into the dino's back; blood rapidly seeping out and flowing over his shoes. Gneo licked his lips as he pictured his meal awaiting him. He froze the hilt of the sword, and let the energy surge downward past the blade, and finally to the monster itself. It froze over the blood, stopping the bleeding immediately, and continued up and down the spine, creating a blue line as it traveled over the body. He waited until he heard the freezing stop to pull out the sword.

"Chow time." Gneo said as he hacked away at the beast. He chopped, and hacked, and sliced, and literally drilled his way down into the opening where the T-Rexaur bit open the roof. Rinoa squealed as he poked his blood-drenched body into the outhouse.

"Ha, ha, you people look funny upside down." Gneo laughed as he sung upright, and dropped down to stand level with the half naked couple. He was soaked head to toe in ruby red T-Rexaur blood. It dripped all around him. Even his dreadlocks were drenched in blood. Rinoa backed up as to not get equally as wet.

"AH! Gneo, get out!" Rinoa yelled.

"Is that how you thank your savoir? Tch, fine." Gneo snapped his fingers, and two sounds could be heard from outside. One, the sound of a lot of ice shattering. Two, the sound of a T-Rexaur in serious pain. It squealed and roared, and made odd noises. This attracted the group of Zell, Selphie, Irvine, and Quistis, who were just walking by to see what was causing the T-Rexaur to break out in horrid seizures. After ten seconds of ear splitting roaring and odd shaking movements, the T-Rexaur finally got off the house, and fell on the tree Gneo was sleeping in earlier, crushing it to pieces.

"What was that?" Squall asked.

"Ever had your brain literally explode after being frozen?" Gneo asked.

"Ewww…I don't want to go out there. Not to mention the fact that I'm half naked. Gneo, out NOW!" Rinoa yelled.

"Okay, okay, geez…" Gneo opened the door, to find Selphie, Zell, Irvine and Quistis. Zell, Selphie, and Quistis clapped their hands over their eyes, while Irvine just starred at the sight of a half naked Rinoa. They could barley see Squall.

"No! Gneo, shut it!" Rinoa ordered. Gneo slammed the door shut.

"Okay…first you want me out, then you want me to shut the door. Pick one.

"Out." Rinoa pointed up.

"Oh. I see…" Gneo jumped very high up, and opened up a teleport hole above him, which had its exit reside where Zell, Selphie, Quistis, and Irvine were standing.

"Gneo!" Quistis ran up to Gneo, but then stopped short at the sight of every inch of him covered in T-Rexaur blood.

"Whoa! I could use this as a blonde repellent! Cool…" Gneo licked some of the blood off of his arm, then licked his lips. "Is there anything you need to ask me? Or can I eat now?" Gneo asked. After hearing no reply after a few seconds, he turned around and ran towards the dead T-Rexaur, and started eating, his four fangs—two on the top and two on the bottom became very visible. Suddenly, Rinoa barged out of the outhouse, wearing Squall's Moogle-print boxers.

"Hi guys!" Rinoa yelled. Quistis and Selphie rushed up to greet her. Zell and Irvine walked over to Squall as he walked out.

"Hey, at least I don't need to ask you the gig question, 'boxers or briefs?'" Irvine stated.

"Yeah, Rinoa looks better in them than you do." Zell remarked. This caused Squall to get Zell in a headlock and to give him a noogie. Zell was able to escape out of it, and he spun around Squall, pinning his arm behind him. All was good. Laughter, playing, and a few rumbling tummies.

"Hey guys, you wanna ditch this place?" Selphie asked. "We are starving."

"Sure." Zell let go of Squall's arm.

"Hey, blue dude." Irvine yelled. Gneo's head popped out of the dead T-Rexaur. "Okay red dude…hey, now you aren't a bligger!" Irvine yelled. A hole opened up in front of Irvine in which Gneo came out of.

"Never again." Said Gneo after a few seconds of glaring.

"Okay, hey, it's getting late," Irvine looked at the over sized clock on the ceiling. "About eight thirty. Would you like to join us in dinner?" Irvine tried to sound as gentlemen-like as he could.

"Night-food? That's okay, I got plenty of food. Want some?" Gneo asked. Selphie almost puked. Again.

"Um, I think what he meant, was would you like to maybe take some of that-um-T-Rexaur meat with you and sit and talk with us in the cafeteria while we all eat?" Selphie asked politely.

"Sure." Gneo jumped back in the hole that led to the sight of the T-Rexaur, and remerged seconds later with a large heart twice the size of his own head. "Okay, I'm ready." Gneo replied.

"Well then, let's go! I'm so hungry…" Zell led the way as they started out the training center, and to the cafeteria.

**XxX **

**Hello! Sorry this one is a bit shorter then other chapters…and that it took so frick'en long. Here is my excuse. I am a Red Belt in Tae-Kwon-Do. Very close to being a Red Belt with Black stripe. (Then after that, I'm a full-fledged Black Belt! Yay .) Anyway, I challenged myself to breaking four boards with my right fist. The first three were split in half by my punch, but the fourth one kinda disagreed with me, and it kinda messed up my hand. It hurt to type. Sorry. Also, next week is spring break for me. So, if you don't see this updated in a little more than a week, don't try to kill me. I will be away from all things Internet-like. Sorry again. Please don't kill me. BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You will have a very hard time trying. Rock on. (Hi Shadowrules! No, YOU rule:P ) Also, thank you all reviewers! You all kick total ass!**

O.J. did it.


	6. The Dope Show

**A/N: People, I am VERY sorry for taking so long. Before I start rambling, did I ever get to apologize to an author called "Shadowrules" for accidentally misconceiving her gender? Sorry babe I will now tell everyone that you are a girl. (Hey, everyone, she's a girl! My mistake! I messed up) Okay, now I'd like to see a show of hands of who wants to kill me for waiting the length of time for three whole ice ages, a war, finding a political leader in a spider hole, and Michael Jackson having sex with 100 underage boys before updating. (allegedly, of coarse) Hmmmmm…okay, so that's about everybody. In fact, it was so long, that the author I mentioned a little bit ago even changed her pen name a couple of times. It was "Shadowrules," then "Dante's Awakening," and then "Arya the Hedgehog," and now it's "Isis of the Turks", but in any case, she has quite an impressive collection of FF VII, FF VIII, and Sonic the Hedgehog stories, (as well as others) so it would be good for your health to check them out! Well, I hope this chapter satisfies you for the time being, because I'm supposed to be doing homework right now. But I just love you people sooooooooo much! Hope you are ready for:**

**Chapter Six:**

The Dope Show 

"Okay guys, I have this all totally planned out. Alright now, there will be a competition, and I have all of it figured out." Selphie said ecstatically. No one seemed to be listening though, Quistis was talking to Irvine about how disgusting it was that Gneo brought a T-Rexuar heart to the cafeteria, and Zell and Gneo were laughing and eating like monsters, making it look like a zombie had better table manners. Squall was being his normal anti-social self, slowly chewing a piece of turkey that was already liquefied in his mouth until he finally swallowed and took another bite.

"Hey there, beautiful. Wanna bite?" Gneo asked a girl passing by, holding up the bloody heart in her face.

"Gross! No thanks!" The girl power walked away. Zell laughed so hard he nearly choked.

"Um, guys…" Selphie tried to direct her friend's attention to her.

"Gneo, stop harassing people as they walk by." Rinoa said as she sat down at the dinner table next to Squall. She then began picking at her deformed chicken leg with her spork.

"HELLO?" Selphie yelled.

"Hi." Gneo greeted.

"Alright, smart ass…anyway, people, I have the plans all ready!" Selphie announced.

"Does it have anything to do with Christmas coming up in a couple of weeks?" Quistis asked. Selphie was silent for a few seconds.

"…AAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Selphie screamed, pounding her fists on the table.

"Hey there, calm down, Selphie." Irvine cooed, rubbing her back.

"Waaaahhhhhh! I have no ideas for Christmas! This is terrible! I'm no good!" Selphie cried.

"There, there, that's not true-"

"I HAVE IT!" Gneo stood up and yelled, dropping his T-Rexuar heart.

"Have what?" Selphie asked through a sob.

"Plans for the party. Okay, It's going to be what you earthlings call 'Christmas' right?" Gneo waited for everyone to nod his or her head in agreement. "Well, why not have a four day weekend?" Gneo suggested.

"Unacceptable." Xu retorted. Quistis nodded in agreement.

"Let me finish. I've studied your human celebrations, and I thought about something, have it be two days-"

"But I thought you said four days." Selphie Interrupted. Gneo glared at her, so she stopped talking.

"Okay now, like I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, just have two of the four days overlap the weekend. So even though we would get four days off, two of them we would have off anyway." Gneo suggested, picking up his bloody heart again. "That way, only two 'school days' would be taken up."

"LET'S HAVE SANTA COME!" Selphie jumped up and yelled. Everyone was now staring at them at their table. Zell began banging his head on the table, repeating the words, "There's no place like home, there's no place like home," over and over again. Gneo sighed, grabbed Selphie's arm, and walked her away from the table, near the entrance to the cafeteria.

"Listen, uhhh…Selphie. I-uh-"

"Now commencing listening sequence!" Selphie blurted, and saluted.

"…I-…errr…do you do any fucking drugs, human? Pot? Meth? Angel dust?" Gneo asked.

"Tee-hee! Rinoa has angel wings on the back of her shirt! They're pretty! Tee-hee!" Selphie giggled. Gneo gave her a blank stare.

"Right…I'll…just…pretend that you never said that…but let's get this over with. I've studied human holidays and religions. There's something about 'Christmas' that I want to tell you about. This might be a shock to you, but Santa is fake." Gneo said with an uneasy felling in his voice. A tear swelled in Selphie's eye. She started crying and screaming at the top of her lungs. She ran back over to Irvine.

"WAAAAAHHHHHH! IRVY! Gneo, he-he-he told me Santa wasn't real! Waaahhhhh! Give me another fix, Irvy, please?" Selphie sobbed.

"Wait, a WHAT!" Zell yelled.

"Fix? Damn, you do drugs, Selphie?" Squall asked, as something more exciting then a dancing naked Rinoa entered his thoughts.

"Shut up, Selphie!" Irvine yelled. Selphie passed out over Irvine. Slowly, everyone started to stare at Irvine with a scared look of disbelief. All but Irvine knew what to do.

**. Three minutes later, in front of Irvine and Selphie's dorm room 0.0**

Zell tried opening the door, but it would not budge. He tried pulling harder, but still nothing happened.

"That's it. I'm busting it down." Zell said. He backed up some, then charged the door with his shoulder. The door snapped in half, then slid in.

"What the heck was that for? It was unlocked!" Irvine exclaimed.

"No it wasn't. Look. I think I know when a door won't open without a bit of force. I couldn't pull it open." Zell informed. Irvine sighed.

"That's because it was a sliding door…" Irvine whimpered, twitching as he spoke.

"Who cares about the door, let's find the blow." Gneo said, stepping into the room and began searching for drugs.

"Oops. I guess it does slide open…" Zell slid what was left of the door back and forth.

"Blow? You are a pervert, Gneo. However, I do know a girl that's into that kinda thing…besides Quistis I mean." Rinoa said, looking under Irvine's bed.

"WHAT!" Quistis screamed, taking her attention away from searching the closet enough to yell at Rinoa.

"No, no, human. I do not mean oral sex when I say 'blow'. I mean the other word or form of cocaine." Gneo replied. Irvine stood in a speechless terror as his friends eagerly searched his room for drugs.

"Oh. Okay…oh! Oops, never mind, it's just some powdered sugar. Sorry, false alarm everybody." Rinoa said as she put the bag back in the dresser. Everyone gasped.

"Wait! Lemme see that 'powdered sugar' Rinoa." Zell hopped over the bed and ran over to Rinoa. Rinoa opened her hand, reveling a small bag made of dragon skin.

"What have we here?" Squall asked as he peeked into the bag as Zell opened it. BAM! Handfuls of confetti lurched out of the bag and blasted Zell and Squall in the face.

"AHHHHH! Ib in by nobe! Ib in by nobe!" Zell yelled as he frantically blew the paper confetti out of his nose.

"Ow! It stings! This is worse than when Rinoa hugged me, and a broken piece from her wire bra jabbed me in the eye!" Squall complained as he rubbed his eyes. Irvine and Gneo burst out laughing.

"Tssshahahahahahahahahahaaaaaa! This is too much! I can't believe you guys fell for it! Selphie isn't on drugs!" Irvine laughed.

"Then how do you explain how Selphie's been acting?" Quistis accused.

"What? It's Selphie. I don't have to explain. It's just…you know…Selphie. You just don't ask. Because there is no true answer."

"Good Point."

"Wait a second," Gneo intervened. "Poked you in the eye with a wire bra? You are taller than Rinoa, Squall. There's no way you could have been just 'hugging'. You were so going straight for her breas-"

"Alright then, let's put this to the test," Rinoa cut Gneo off. "Get out of the room everybody, I have a plan." Rinoa said, pushing everyone out. "Stand back." Rinoa called forth the spirit of Leviathan. There was a rumbling sound behind them. Everyone turned around to see the center fountain move and take shape into Leviathan. It surged forward into Irvine's door room, and washed up everything in sight.

"Woaho-ho! That is one sweet monster!" Gneo chuckled. Leviathan stopped rampaging inside the dorm room. It began to turn around.

"Hey! (hic) Who-you call'en a monster, ugly?" Leviathan spoke.

"Who are you call'en ugly, monster?" Gneo replied.

"You, you blue freak."

"But you are blue too. At least you were a few seconds ago…"

"What happened to my Leviathan? Irvine, what in the world was in there?" Rinoa asked.

"Top quality-"

"Rotgut." Squall cut him off.

"Right, how did you know?" Irvine asked.

"I'd know that color anywhere." Squall replied. Meanwhile, Gneo and Leviathan were staring each other down.

"What color is that thing now? Fuchsia? Is that stuff even legal to have in a Garden?" Zell wondered aloud.

"Okay, now I don't even care how legal it is or not, Irvine." Quistis barked. "What I care about is the fact that we have a gigantic drunk water serpent on our hands. And the fact that you had enough alcohol to make a gigantic water serpent drunk."

"Oh-yeah? Well, your mother wears army boots!" Gneo yelled.

"But me mother doesn't even (hic) have any legs!" Leviathan yelled back.

"Yeah? Well-uh…err-you don't even, um…what the hell are you, anyway?" Gneo asked.

"Your demise!" Leviathan surged towards Gneo, mouth wide open.

"Heh." Gneo grinned. "Nice try." Gneo leaped up into the air, evading the creature's attack. Leviathan slammed into the ground, splashed into a water form, and leaped high upward to snatch Gneo in mid air.

"Oh no you don't!" Gneo melted himself into water, along with his sword. He unsheathed his sword with a splash, and pointed the sword directly downward. Water parted from Leviathan as it leapt up and met the liquid tip of Kazama. Gneo landed with a gush, while Leviathan landed with a sickening thud, having changed back to it's normal physical form after being cut in half lengthwise.

"Wha-wha-what just happened?" Rinoa said with a look of horror as her GF faded away into pyreflys to go to the farplane.

"I killed it." Gneo answered. Everyone stared at Gneo in a ghostly silence.

"You WHAT!" Rinoa yelled.

"_Awww crap…_" Gneo thought.

"Shhhhhhhhhhhhit! Were are so totally screwed if we run across a monster that is only weak against water!" Zell bellowed.

"No…that's not good…" Squall said.

"Noooooo! My girl next door magazine! It's soaked!" Irvine whimpered. Rinoa ran over to Gneo and grabbed him by the neck of his tank top.

"So, how are you gonna repay me for my GF? Huh? And money won't bring back a helping hand, either!" Rinoa screamed.

"Then I shall fill in the place of that helping hand!" Gneo yelled back.

"Huh?" Rinoa let go of Gneo. "Yeah…that's it…I'm making you my bitch!" Rinoa announced.

"Wa-what?" Squall gasped.

"Not sex-bitch…my slave! Now sit boy!" Rinoa commanded. Gneo sat. "Bark for me, bitch!" Warily, Gneo let out a couple barks.

"Oh my…what's going on? Did I hear someone bark?" Selphie regained consciousness, but no one seemed to care too much.

"Grrrrrr…BARK!" Gneo let out one last miserable bark.

"Good boy…I mean bitch. From now on, I may call you on command by the sound of this whistle." Rinoa took a whistle out of her shorts pocket and blew on it hard. Gneo's ears perked up, and then he began screaming in pain.

"AHHHHHH! Okay! Stop it! I get it!" Gneo helplessly squirmed on the ground, covering his ears.

"What is that, Rinoa? And where did you get it?" Quistis asked.

"Oh, it's just the same whistle I use for Angelo. But for some reason, it doesn't affect him any more. Oh yeah, he went deaf after time compression." Rinoa pouted. "Wait a second…why can you hear this? We can't. Come to think of it, I don't think we've ever seen your ears before…" something on the side of Gneo's head made a dreadlock flick this way and that. Rinoa tried reaching for Gneo's ears, but he ducked away from her hand.

"No! Get away!" Gneo yelled, clapping his hands over his ears.

"C'mon, let me see your ears…" Rinoa tried grabbing again, but missed. "Hey, Selphie, Quistis, hold him steady, will you?" Rinoa asked. Selphie grabbed hold of Gneo's left arm, while Quistis held the right. Rinoa tried once again to reach for Gneo's ears.

"Ah, hell no." Gneo melted into water, and splashed through Quistis and Selphie's grip. He was making his way for the center pool, as to blend in with all the other water, when Selphie stopped him dead in his tracks.

"I know what to do!" Selphie took out her nunchaku, and swung them around, then thrust them in font of her. "THUNDAG-" in a split second, Gneo leapt out of the puddle he was, solidified, and clapped his hand over Selphie's mouth, stopping the spell she was about to cast on him.

"NO! Don't you damn dare even think about using that spell on me. It'd-" but before Gneo could finish, Selphie suddenly grabbed Gneo's ears. Selphie's eyes widened. So did Gneo's.

"What in the…?" Selphie pulled away some dreadlocks that were covering his ears, and two blue furry dog ears perked up. Selphie gasped.

"How CUTE!" Selphie screamed, and started playing with his fluffy ears.

"Oh my…" Quistis stared at the odd pair of furry ears.

"What the hell?" Squall could not believe what he was seeing.

People began forming groups around them to see what all the commotion was, and to point and laugh at Gneo. He tried walking away.

"Where do you think you're going, mister dog ears? Get back here!" Rinoa ordered.

"Hey! What makes you think I will obey your every whim?" Gneo asked.

"I didn't say that…but it does sound like a good idea." Rinoa agreed with herself.

"What? No, no this can't be happening. Screw you guys, I'm going to go kill something." Gneo muttered as he turned and headed for the training center.

"Are you going to let him get away, Rinoa?" Quistis asked.

"I don't need him this very second." Rinoa replied, watching a few sophomores start picking on Gneo.

"Bark for me bitch!" One of the sophomores said.

"I bark…for no man. I you have a problem with it, let's settle it in the training center." Gneo replied.

"Fine with me, bligger." The sophomore spat.

"WHAT…DID…YOU…JUST…CALL…ME!" Gneo growled.

"I called you a bli-"

"AAAAHHHHH!" Gneo created a portal right behind the sophomore and tackled him into it. Everyone stared at the portal where the two were sucked into in an awkward silence. Suddenly, someone spoke.

"FIGHT! LET'S GO!" a junior yelled.

"What should we do? Do you think they are in the training center?" Quistis asked, facing Rinoa.

"I don't know," Rinoa answered, "but I hope my bitch is doing okay."

"Don't worry, I am. How is mine doing?" Squall asked. Rinoa didn't reply.

**A/N: Erm, hello. How was this chapter? I try to include as much action and humor as I can, as that is all that goes on in my head. Besides music, TV, movies, hentai, video games, hentai, friends, martial arts, hentai, fighting, blood, gore, hentai, weapons. OH! And, before I forget, please do not give me a sexual harassment lawsuit Lauren, I call all my female friends "babe". (no, I'm not a womanizer, so don't anyone even think about it, it's just a friendly gesture. Live with it) By the way…wanna know something funny? I had from here on out to the end—the whole story figured out, just not typed. Now I forget. Crap…**

**But I did fix my piece o' crap computer! **


	7. Lucky, Lucky, Lucky

**AN/ Hell yeah! I'm on a roll! FINALLY UPDATED! Ooo-rah!**

WARNING: This story contains language that may not be suitable for small children. Wait-maybe I should not have waited until the seventh chapter to say this. Oh well. Why not change it to an "M" rating? Well duh, then it doesn't show up right away on the screen, you have to manually change the search to include stories with an "M" rating. So I am aiding you and I in becoming lazier. Besides, what teen doesn't know the basic four letter words? GODDAMNIT!)

Wait…did I change the rating? Hmmm…don't care enough to remember…or look…or change…

Chapter 7 

**Lucky, lucky, lucky**

"So, any questions, class?" Quistis asked her students.

"Yeah, who or what the hell is this?" Someone sitting in the row in front of Squall asked, pointing at Gneo, who was sitting in the back row next to him.

"Oh! Perfect timing, I almost forgot! Why don't you come to the front of the classroom, Gneo and introduce yourself to your classmates?" Quistis said.

"Why? Why don't I? Do I really have to answer that for you?" Gneo said in a smart-ass tone. Quistis glared at him. "What?"

"Come up here!"

"No! I'll come somewhere if you spell it differently!"

"What are you, three years old?"

"…"

"What now?"

"Alright, I'll go up there."

"I don't want to meet him anymore." Said the girl who asked who Gneo was in the first place. The class laughed.

"Well, too bad." Gneo opened up two portals, one beneath him, and one in front of the classroom. He fell through the one on his seat, and stepped out of the second portal in front of the class. There were plenty of "ooo's" and "ahhh's and that's gay's to be heard from the class.

"Hello. As you may know, my name is Gneo. You my have also found out by now, I am not from this planet."

"Thank Hyne!" said the girl who asked him who he was. The class laughed again.

"And who are you, little girl?" Gneo asked sarcastically.

"My name is Yoko."

"You-…are not a virgin, are you?" Gneo asked.

"What? How do you-"

"Your frigg'en name gave it away. Anyway, I am not human. Duh, as if you couldn't tell. My race is known as the Doku race. I can summon the powers of ice and water, and even turn into it myself, but that's it. Oddly enough, I am weak against water and ice, but I absorb electricity."

"But I thought you-" Gneo elbowed through the portal behind him and hit Squall in the side to make him stop talking. He then leaned backwards to stick his head in the portal to talk to Squall.

"Shhh, they don't know that." Gneo whispered.

"That's cold." Squall whispered back.

"You have no idea exactly how cold that is." Gneo gave him a sharp-toothed grin and pulled out of the portal. "Like I was saying, that's how my magic works. There, now you know what I'm weak against, so now you can challenge me, if you have the guts. Just remember that I live, breath, and dream fighting."

"Do you eat fighting as well?" Yoko asked. The class laughed a third time.

"No, I eat girls." Gneo answered. Quistis made an "A-hem!" noise to signify that that was inappropriate.

"Right, uh-huh, sure you do. Gay alien." Yoko snapped back. The class roared with laughter.

"I wonder how you taste, Yoko-ow! What the hell?" Squall had thrown a pencil down the portal Gneo had created next to him, to see what happens. It went through and hit Gneo in the back of the head.

"_Heh-heh, that was cool."_ Squall said to himself.

"Stop messing with my magic, damnit!" Gneo yelled. Someone in the class started crying, claiming his spleen ripped open from laughter. Another classmate asked him if he even knew what his spleen was.

"Alright, class, settle down. Why don't you return to your seat, Gneo?" Quistis commanded. Gneo fell backwards into the portal, and landed in his seat. He then closed the portals with a clap of his hands.

"Sorry about that." Squall apologized.

"That's okay. This sort of shit happens to me wherever I go. Even in school at home…" Gneo stared downward. Yoko heard him say this, but she didn't say anything. She just ran her fingers through her curly brown shoulder length hair and pretended not to notice anything.

"Miss Quistis, where's Todd?" Yoko asked.

"Oh, right, before I forget, I'd like to say that classmates should please be careful when sparring with one another in the training area." Quistis announced. "And NOT injure one another." Yoko gasped. Gneo slammed his fist on the computer screen implanted in his desk.

"Wow, now he's acting like Seifer." Someone said.

"Hey, I wonder if he'll lead an attack against us now." Someone else said.

"But his scar isn't a straight slash in between his eyes. It's looks more like a bolt of lightning that starts above his right eye, and splits under it, and then travels down to the bottom of his cheek."

"What, this ol' thing?" said Gneo, rubbing his scar.

"Shut up people." Said Squall with an uneasy tone.

"Harry Potter!" Someone squealed.

"What's a Seifer?" Gneo asked.

"Stop it!" Squall yelled.

"And then he'll try to kill us all!" Yelled a classmate.

"What's a Seifer? Is it food? Does it taste good?" Gneo asked.

"Shut up! Shut up all of you!" Squall stood up and shouted.

"Why don't you ask that Rinoa chick? She should know how he tastes." Someone said.

"FUCK OFF!" Squall screamed.

"Class dismissed!" Quistis announced, with a scared tone in her voice.

**. . . XD . . 0.0 . . XD . . . **

"This blows." Zell told Squall. They were sitting on the bench in front of the library.

"…" Squall said nothing.

"My girlfriend is kinda angry at me right now." Zell stared down the hallway leading to the library, hoping he could catch a glimpse of her.

"…"

"I don't know what I did, or didn't do, so I told her so. I think that's why she's angry at me."

"…"

"Man, it's tough being a boyfriend. Does this ever happen with you and Rinoa? She gets angry at you for no apparent reason?"

"…"

"And then she gets angry for you not knowing why she was angry at you in the first place? What, does she expect me to be some sort of psychic mind reader?" Zell stood up and asked.

"Whatever." Squall stood up and headed back to the dorms to retire for the day.

"Well," Zell said, sitting back down, "I'm glad every thing has returned back to normal. Sort of."

Squall was slowly walking towards the dorms, when he saw a boy wearing a bright blue shirt jogging around the garden.

"Hi there, commander Squall!" The little boy greeted. Squall played along.

"You got a name, soldier?" Squall asked.

"Yes sir, the name's Roger." Roger answered, jogging in place.

"Well then, Roger, how are we doing today?" Squall asked.

"Well, if you are as happy as a lamb too sir, then I would have to say that 'we' are doing good today." Roger remarked.

"You're a smart one," Squall replied, "Why are you always running around the garden, Roger?" Squall asked.

"I'm endurance training to become the strongest SeeD ever. I can't wait until I become a SeeD. Then I'll become your bestest lieutenant ever!" Roger exclaimed.

"And I'm sure you will. Uh-…here. Take this. Hopefully it'll help you in your training." Squall handed him an elixir.

"Gee-thanks sir! I'll train real hard to help everyone here at the garden!" Roger said with glee as he pocketed his gift.

"Good luck!" Squall waved to Roger as he ran off.

"Ow! Watch it there, you little brat!" Roger had run over Zell's foot near the entrance to the library.

"Ppppppppt!" Roger stuck out his tongue at Zell.

"What! Get back here, you little shrimp!" Zell chased after Roger.

Squall was just about to start walking back to the dorms when he heard a roar in the distance. He turned around to see people running away from the entrance to the training center.

"Damn." Squall muttered. "Everything does lead back to that place."

"Eeeeeeek! Two monsters escaped from the training center!" A girl screamed.

"Yeeeee-ha! Giddy up Hexadragon!" Gneo was on top of the monster, riding it like a bull. He smacked the dragon's rump with the flat of his sword. The Hexadragon reared up on its hind legs, and let out a deafening roar. It started to charge forward, but before it could go farther then ten feet from the entrance to the training center, Gneo created a portal in front of the beast and they both disappeared into thin air. An awkward silence filled the air where the dragon and the Doku had been. Everyone stared at each other.

"…"

"…"

"…" Nobody said anything.

"THAT WAS AWESOME!" Selphie screamed. No one paid any attention to her.

"Aw, c'mon people! Doesn't anyone here think that was cool?" Selphie yelled.

"No." Someone answered.

"Who knows what kind of trouble that freak could be causing right now!" Yoko exclaimed, daring to crawl out from under a bench she was hiding under.

"You know Yoko, if you were not as much as a bitch as you are, I would agree with Gneo that you are actually pretty cute." Selphie smirked.

"WHAT!" Yoko and Zell both freaked out. Zell ran over to Selphie.

"Gneo has the hots' for Yoko?" Zell whispered to Selphie.

"No, but I just thought it would be fun to see-"

"You are evil." Zell said flatly. Selphie giggled.

Before anything else could distract him, Squall hurried off to his dorm. As soon as he got there, he flopped onto his bed and immediately indulged himself in his own mind.

"_What a crazy day_." He thought. "_Why does everything keep ending up in mentioning Seifer? Seifer. Great, just thinking about that creep makes my head hurt. Is he dead? He has to be. Well, its not as if I actually saw him kick the bucket. I hope he did, though. In fact, I hope he's fishing in hell…fishing for a second chance at a life he could have led in a different way…the right way. No sorceress. No Rinoa. No scar_." Squall rolled around on his futon, felling sleepy. Suddenly, the door burst open.

"I'll grab his legs, you get the arms!" Zell yelled as he ran into Squall's room. He ran up and tore the covers off of Squall's bed.

"Hey! What's going on-" Before Squall could finish, Zell grabbed Squall's legs, and pulled him out of bed. Squall yelled in pain as his head met the cold hard floor.

"OW!" Squall tried to grab the back of his head, when he felt the slam of nunchaku smash him on the side of his face.

"Let's bring him out." He heard Selphie say in an evil tone. He could feel his body being lifted up, and carried out of the room. After a short while, he could hear the sound of rushing water and screaming.

"Hey! Get me down from here!" Rinoa screamed.

"Yeah. After we went though all that hard work? Shut up." Irvine smacked Rinoa across the face. Zell and Selphie dropped Squall on the ground.

"Trust me, 'commander'. This is going to hurt me a lot more than it's gonna hurt you." Zell picked up Squall by the brim of his shirt and started head-butting Squall repeatedly in the face until he heard the loud crunch of his nose breaking. Blood gushed out of the injury.

"Hold him Selphie." Zell said. Squall quickly leapt to his feet and slid the gunblade out of its sheath.

"Not so fast." Selphie's nunchaku came down hard on Squall's wrists. His gunblade chimed as it struck the ground.

"You're a quick one." Zell chuckled.

"Hey! Stop it you monsters!" Rinoa yelled.

"I thought Irvine told you to shut up, bitch." Gneo unsheathed his sword. "Now I have to cut your pretty little face." Gneo brought the tip of a sickle edge on his sword to Rinoa's cheek. He pressed in and dragged it downward, cutting a deep gash. Rinoa winced and tried not to scream, but failed. Gneo laughed at the sound of her agony. Selphie wrapped her arms around Squall from behind so that they went under his armpits and up behind his neck.. Zell drove his fist straight into Squall's solar plexus, making him cough up blood on Zell.

"Thanks a lot, asshole." Zell said in a nasty tone. "This was a new shirt. Alright. Let him see her." Zell commanded. Selphie grabbed Squall's hair, kneed him in the spine, and then pulled his hair downward, forcing him to look up and stare in horror at what they had done to his beloved Rinoa. They were outside of the dorms , right in front of the pool of water that surrounds the center elevator. The water was churning rapidly. Coming out of the water, were two large pillars of ice. Hanging from those pillars at the base was Rinoa, who was being held by two shackles made of ice that were firmly gripping her wrists. They were the same shackles that had held Squall while Gneo was trying to stop him from killing himself. She was crying.

"Hey! Let her go!" Squall yelled.

"Shut up!" Irvine exclaimed. He cocked his gun, then shot Rinoa in the leg. She screamed out loud and more tears came rolling down. Some tears rolled over the cut, the salt stinging the wound. Tears mixed with blood, causing red streaks to run down her face.

"Well, isn't that a pretty sight?" Gneo asked.

"No, this is." Irving said as he shot her straight through the chest. Rinoa wailed with pain and anger.

"Oops, your heart must be on the other side. My sincerest apologies." Irvine said as he aimed a bit more to the left, and pierced her heart with his last bullet. Her crying stopped, as well as her shaking and breathing. Her lifeless body hung there dully, her spirit sagging in its cold prison.

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!" Squall screamed.

"Oh. I think this is." Gneo swung his sword foreword and severed the shackles that bound Rinoa's body, as well as her head from her neck. Gneo caught the head, but let the body fall into the water.

"Why Squall, why couldn't you help me?" Gneo made Rinoa's mouth move, mocking her voice. "Why didn't you save me?" Gneo dangled the head in front of Squall's face.

"I FUCKING HATE YOU! I HATE YOU!" Squall screamed in rage. Gneo cackled as he flipped the head sideways and wiped the severed neck all over Squall's face, smearing blood on him.

"Now didn't that fell weird?" Irvine asked.

"DIE! I WANT YOU TO FUCKING DIE AND GO TO HELL! GET OUT OF MY FACE! GET OUT OF MY LIFE!" Squall sat up in bed and collided with Rinoa's forehead, who was standing over him. Squall looked around he saw that Rinoa's head was intact. A huge wave of relief swept over him like a cool evening breeze. Squall leapt out of bed, and hugged Rinoa.

"Oh Rinoa, I'm so glad you're okay I just had the most insane drea—hey, -what's with the fancy dress?"

"What?" Rinoa pushed him off. She was wearing her off-white formal dress and high heels.

"What's the matter?" Squall asked.

"That's what I'd like to ask you. First you ask what's wrong with me, then you tell me that you hate me-"

"What? But I was just-"

"Then you want me to die and go to hell, get out of your face-"

"Rinoa, I was just dreamin-"

"Don't 'Rinoa' me!" She yelled. "Then-…you…you…said you wanted me to get out of your life."

"No, that wasn't it-"

"Then what was it? I thought what we had was real, Squall. I want what you want, so if you want me out of your life, then…then…" Rinoa started to cry.

"That's not what I want." Squall cooed.

"Yes it is! You even yelled it at me! If you want it, fine, we're through!"

"Rinoa!"

"It's over! It's what you want." Rinoa started out the door.

"Wait!" Squall could hear the clicking and clacking of her high heels pick up speed.

Squall swore he saw one of her tears on the floor turn red.

**0.o;**

**REALLY BIG A/N: So, how was it? Did you cry as much as I did? Wait, I didn't cry. I'm tough. Sort of. Anyway, if your tears didn't ruin your keyboard, then please tell me how you thought this went. If you don't hate me too much for being a jerk and not updating for so long, that is. Also, let me know if you want the "Yoko" character that I made up to die. Huh? That's not a spoiler…oh, and don't even ask me, "What the fuck were you thinking when you wrote the end of this chapter?" A simple, "You know what? I fuck'n hate you for the way you wrote the end of this chapter," or the even more simple, "You know what? I fuck'n hate you." will suffice. All is accepted here in a little place I like to call my brain. Flame me if you fell like it. (and yes, I meant "feel") No, I don't usually flame people, unless that other person's story is REALLY bad, but hey, we all have our own flaws. (psst, mine is updating at the same speed as California is separating from the U.S.-in other words, really really slow-what the hell? Why is the second 'really' underlined with a squiggly red line? And why is the 'a' in that last sentence underlined with a green squiggly line? That's not incorrect grammar. It's 'a' if the next word starts with a consonant, and 'an' if the next word starts with a vowel. Last time I checked, 's' is still a consonant. Stupid Microsoft Word)**

**ROCK ON, MY REVIEWERS! (sigh if I deserve any)**

**(hi Lauren:P)**

**p.s. This may not be updated for…insert any amount of time here**

**pp.ss. Holy crap! As I look back now at the ending bit of this chapter, (the dream) … … … what the hell was going through my mind at that point?**


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